Getting Started…

As this is my first post, I’ll use this opportunity to summarize what I’m trying to impact with Narratives Coaching. I have a huge passion for helping people break free of negative thinking and move past stigmatizations, whether socially- or self-imposed, preventing them from moving forward and achieving their dreams. Experiences from your past can start a cycle of negative thinking which, over time, becomes habituated and begins to drag down energies and enthusiasm. Or maybe it wasn’t any one or more experiences, but you just seem to have been wired to think in negative terms and, to you, the glass is perpetually half-empty. Or perhaps you’ve struggled with substance use or other negative behaviors, and you’ve been labeled as a troublemaker, problem child, or voted most likely to end up incarcerated or dead. Regardless the source, the result is almost always the same – low self-esteem, self-worth, self-image, self-talk, etc. and a generalized sense that maybe people were right and you’re just not going to make it.

The purpose of my coaching effort is to help identify the negative, self-defeating thinking and internal language preventing you from thriving. That life you dreamed about when you were young – that’s always been just beyond your reach? It’s still there, and identifying that negative inner narrative that’s sabotaging your every effort is the key to unlocking your better self. Add to this the social- and self-imposed labels (stigmas) which, over time we’ve heard so many times we’ve come to believe, and you’re guaranteed to fail. Maybe you’ve heard the phrase “once an addict, always an addict”. True or not, the stigma that comes with that is that you’ll never break free from your addictions or behaviors, and you’ll never rise above a mediocre level of success and freedom.

Social Stigma: the disapproval of, or discrimination against, a person based on perceivable social characteristics that serve to distinguish them from other members of a society. Social stigmas are commonly related to culture, gender, race, intelligence, and health.

It’s the health aspect of the definition above I’m targeting; buried within that generalization are myriad concerns including addictions, various mental health issues and homelessness. Looking one layer deeper, I’m talking specifically about any form of addiction – drugs, alcohol, sex (pornography), food, gambling, etc. and the attendant social or self-discriminations preventing a person from having the expansive life they’ve always dreamed of having. While there can be serious mental health concerns requiring the help of a trained medical professional, in my experience many people sabotage and undermine their own efforts due to toxic thinking, low self-image (esteem), an exaggerated negativity bias, and an overall self-defeating attitude practiced and habituated over time and cemented as the default inner narrative of their lives.

Many times unchecked addiction or mental health concerns result in criminal records and even imprisonment. This adds another layer of stigmatization (social or self-imposed) further preventing the person from enjoying a happy and healthy life. More, homelessness can result from runaway addiction and mental health issues, making it very difficult to break free of the cycle of despair, self-condemnation, low self-worth, and hopelessness that life will ever improve.

There are so many people suffering needlessly, and the multiple layers of complex issues makes attempting change feel futile. One step at a time, one day at a time, I promise there is hope and help is available. You can have the life you’ve hoped and dreamed you would have, but you have to first find and remove the anchors holding you in an immovable place. If you’re struggling to be the person you know you were meant to be, or just keep getting stopped before reaching your goals, I can help correct the negative thinking preventing you from breaking through.